29 September 2009

Barcelona is definitely maybe.(whatever that means)

So i went to Barcelona about 2 weeks ago now and i gotta say, the city itself is an architectural marvel. The Gaudi buildings scattered arounf the city have to be seen to be believed, and La Sagrada Familia is possibly one of the most inspiring places i've ever been to.

It's kinda expensive over there, £7 for a pint if you must know. I went with my classmates, so it was unlike any other holiday i've been on, shenanigans were had, sun was soaked and the food, oh god the food, the sea food was amazing, the paella was beyond description..but funnily enough, the best meal i had over there was ribs and chips, which is odd i know, but i think it's more of an english/western thing, to go somewhere foreign and eat food that you can get back home. funny that.

When I got back from Barca, there wasn't much time to rest as we were back at uni just a few days later. 3rd year has just begun and the work is really beginning to pile on, plus the added joy of my dissertation due in January, our degree show and raising money for it (i'm getting my legs waxed this Thursday to raise money)...is it going to hurt???

i'm really looking forward to this year, working with a new group but old friends, Lauren and Cass, and we're already making headway, letting the creative juices flow, we've got a rapor i feel will help us achieve what it is we all strive for, a 1st....and i know that the synergy of our individual talents will get us there come June 2010.

I wrote about letting things go in my last blog entry before Barcelona, and i'm glad to say i let them go, and came back feeling good about myself and about life, looking forward to new beginnings, and building on relationships i feel i need in my life, i want in my life.

It's funny coz i somehow think that maybe i didn't need the holiday to realise these things, maybe i knew them all along and was just unwilling to let things go and accept what they've become...maybe i'm just getting all philosophical again when i don't really need to...maybe we all need a holiday, maybe it's definitely maybe.

much love

14 September 2009

i shall not be moved.

over the last 4/5 months a lot of things have occured in my life that have tested me beyond measure.
I have been in situations where i was always aware of the outcomes and consequences, by day or by night, i had my own troubles to try and wash away, sometimes to little or no effect, others banished for good, into the depths of eternity.

I've been working my arse off trying to keep things together, in more ways than one.
I don't complain about it, well, i try not too, but i'm human, and i have this inate ability to verbalise myself without any regard to how people will feel about it, and that's just me, but i guess i'm loved and hated, in equal measure for the exact same reasons.
this summer has been hard, whether work or play, rain or shine, there was always something to try me, to test me, to substantiate life's many curve balls thrown my way. Some i knocked out the park, homerun's baby, all the way, over the bleachers, over the fence, into the parking lot, gone, for good...other's didn't even make it past first base.
Anyway, the culmination of all of this has lead me to today, Monday, September 14th 2009. Two days before i go away with my friends from university, to explore Barcelona, to delve deep into the cultural and popular culture of the mother of Gaudi.
I gotta confess, I have set myself a task, to go away and enjoy every second of the trip, to embrace the moments with my frinds, and create memories i can tell my kids about, to finally leave all my problems to God, that come what may, whatever He proclaims to be, will be.
I'm not leaving them in Spain, because problems know their way home, i'm just letting them go, in the air, on the plane, mid-flight, and whatever becomes of them, that too shall pass.
So here's to my first and only trip away with some of the most extraordinary people i have ever met. To friendship, To Barcelona, To London, To Farnham, To the class of 2010, To Us, To You......To Me.
see when i see you, until we meet again
much love

9 September 2009

YOU, over there...........fuck you!!

"You're in my seat"

Once again, London town does not fail to surprise. The people who dwell in this urban metropolis are the most unique, incandescent people in the world.

But, don't let that fool you, among the many visionaries live the imbiciles, the drones, the "sheople" as a good friend put it. Those that strive to live every day like yesterday, the same. Boring and predictable, living within the spheres of normality and habitual susbsitence of the mundane and melancholic.
Yes they live here, in my beautiful city, pissing me off, one at a time.
The reason for this verbal tirade i hear you ask, well, this morning on the train, an empty train i might add, i was confronted by a middle-aged, balding man, who by the looks of things is governed by the principles of convention, the poor sod.

Anyway, he comes up to me and says "you're in my seat." Now i know what you're thinking, how could I be in HIS seat, this is public transport no? Ahh, well here's the thing, not to him, he believed that because he "sits here everyday" he holds the rights to said 1ft x 1ft piece of unhygenic fixture on the 06:06 to London Victoria.
I gladly declined to move, until HE threatened ME for being aggresive. I've got a cold at the moment, and the last thing i wanted was some oxygen theif accusing me of, a) being in his seat and b) being aggresive, so i stood up, looked down at his susbsistent 5'7" frame and kindly told him, i was not going to move and he could gladly fuck the fuck off, god knows who pissed on his chips this morning, but you best believe i was not having any of his shit so early in the morning.

Which lead me to this blog today, thinking about it on the tube, i analysed people getting on and off at every stop, so engrossed in their daily routine that no-one noticed the muscle bound man wearing his girlfriends t-shirt, tight enough to stop blood flow to the medulla oblongata, the moments in life that i live for, the foolishness.

It got me thinking about how i never want to be someone stuck in routine, how i hate repetitive things, and recurrent people, who seemingly bitch and moan about life's trials & tribulations, i'm not saying they go without merit, because we all have our own problems, but we also have a way of changing things, switch it up every now and then, take the bus in to work, get off a station before and walk the rest of the way, get the ferry up the thames if you can, all i'm saying is don't get trapped in the system of habit, because like the stoutly arsehole this morning, you too, will one day be bitching to an anarchistic 22 year old that he's sitting in your seat.

"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome"
Albert Einstein
much love
(someone pass me a tissue)

1 September 2009

The tram is coming!!

i haven't been blogging for some time, well last week i posted up the images from Liu Bolins art, which i still love, but that's about it, and of course we have my guest blog, which i'm gratefull for, shout out to JR....but today dear Blogites, we resume or regular scheduled programming
OK so yesterday i was talking to my older sister, which is always cool coz we have this love/hate relationship, like all siblings i guess.

But the thing that makes our relationship special is probably that we are two very independent people, our souls are intertwined in the sands of time. We live outside the touch of time if you will, we can both live our own lives happily knowing the other is doing just the same, living their life, and not the life others would have us live.
Anyway, we got to talking about choices in life and how everyone has to make them, regardless of who you are and what you posess, we all make our own choices.

Sometimes we as people like to blame other people for our little mishaps in life, we like to say that if it weren't for such and such, i would have made a different choice....bullshit...we had a choice, and because we choose the easy route, 9 times out of 10, we can lay blame to those unable to speak for themselves.

I like to think the decisions i make, are simply that, a choice between left or right, up or down, the red pill or the blue pill, no regrets.

I know it's easy to sit here at my screen and preach to you that you should make YOUR decisions for YOU and not for want of whatever other self-prophecising needs you desire..but i'm not trying to do that, we all collectively are responsible for what happens in our lives, for what WE do, we can't control other people, we will never be able to do so, that's the beauty of the path, it's your and yours only.....

i guess what i'm triying to say is that you gotta do you, for you, because believe me, if you don't care enough about your own happiness, no-one else will.

My sister, as much as it kills me to say this, is the leader of the 3 siblings in my family, the voice of reason and the voice of authority, we live in that system by choice, that's the choice i have made, to take advantage of her wisdom, and to accept the role of younger brother/court gester, but that's why to us, there are no limitations to what we do and don't say to eachother, we shout, we scream, we argue, we swear, hang the phone upon eachother and are simply downright rude to one another at times, and 2 days later, i'll get a call or she'll get a text, and it's like we're kids again, watching those old Disney cartoons, and all that has happened before is obsolete...that's the life we live, that's the choice we make...

to get together like a choir to acquire what we desire.

much love